The
Memories Of John Baker
There are many
times when a memory shows up in the back of a person’s mind. The troubling
thing is when it is a memory of something or some place that the person has
never experienced. Some say that the memory is travel to an alternate reality
or a suppressed memory of another life or even another life being lived by the
dreamer. John Baker didn’t believe any of these as he went through his life
even after the dreams started when he was ten or so.
He went to his
school, Allegheny Heights P.S. 2, everyday. He was a good student who regularly
got A’s and B+’s in nearly every class, If you asked him…he loved Science but,
like most kids, he hated English and Math. He had a lot of friends and was just
pretty much a regular kid.
At night, as soon
as he fell asleep, he entered another world that was similar to his but
different. He lived pretty much the same life except that he was living in
Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio, He went to school, played base ball and hung out with
friends.
Every night he
lived out his live in Ohio and during the day he lived in Pennsylvania. After a
time he started losing too much sleep which began to affect the way his life
was going. His parents took him to doctors, put him in the hospital for tests
and even had him put on medication to make him sleep but none of that worked.
“Mom,” he said one
day. “I like the places I go to and the people I meet. The kids and the
teachers are great there and I would like to keep going there.” Initially she
refused but she saw how much it meant to him so she decided that she would stop
all of the treatments and just accept her son and his little quirk.
Soon he started
telling stories of what was happening when he “went away” as he started calling
it. He described his friends as if they were real. “Dad you should have seen
the home run Billy hit last night,” he would say. “It was the third strike and
he just clobbered it. I have never seen anything like it.”
John’s dad looked
out of the window and saw that there was three inches of snow on the ground
and, when he reminded John of that fact John’s comeback was quick.
“No Dad,” he said
with a touch of hurt in his voice. “Not here. I mean my other friend Billy…the
one in Ohio. I played football with my friend Billy here yesterday. You should
know that.”
Stammering, John’s
dad tried to think of something to say until he finally admitted that he had no
idea how John was keeping his lives straight but he wanted to know more…he
wasn’t even sure that John was telling the truth.
“We went to the
movies,” John said. “I couldn’t believe it. The popcorn was so good and I ate a
lot of it. It had a lot of butter and I liked it.”
He thought about
it for a minute and, after calling his wife over, he realized that John was
saying he was full when he got up and, despite the fact that his mother cooked John’s
favorite pancakes with real maple syrup, he didn’t even look at his breakfast.
“Dad, I must have
eaten twenty pounds of popcorn and a couple gallons of Coke. It was all so
good,” John added.
That went on
throughout John’s childhood starting when he was just six years old. His
parents thought that it may have been something to do with separation anxiety
of his going to school but that was quickly dismissed by pretty much everyone
who knew the story.
When he was a teen
he got more involved with school…taking part in school plays, clubs and
athletic teams. He was even voted as the vice president of his senior class.
That didn’t leave him a lot of time for dating or anything like that but he was
very popular with the girls.
It became more
common that he was coming down for breakfast as tired, if not more tired, than
he was when he went up to bed.
“Man Dad,” he said
one morning. “I went to a concert last night and it was wild. I don’t remember
who the band was but I know the music was great and we didn’t get home until
1:00. I was so tired I took my date home and then I just went home and climbed straight
into bed.”
“You were out on a
date,” he asked.
“Yeah, her name is
Pamela. She is really pretty and I have been seeing her for some time now.”
Now, his dad was
home all night. He knew that John didn’t go out and he wasn’t seeing a girl
named Pamela. But, this was at least something he could check out. He called
the operator and asked her to place a call for him to the Akron Beacon Journal.
It took a couple of minutes but he did finally get through. He asked for the
entertainment editor and asked if there was a concert in town the night before.
“I have a silly
question,” John’s dad started. “I am in Pennsylvania and I was just
wondering…was there a concert down there last night?”
“Yes sir,” he
replied. “There was a concert out at the Cuyahoga Falls High School Gym. I
wasn’t there and it wasn’t big enough for us to cover but I hear that it was a
hell of show.”
John’s dad was in
shock but he took a moment to thank the man before he hung up. He knew that
John was always talking about his “travels” but this was the first time that he
actually had the proof that they actually existed. Now that this had happened
he and John’s mother started taking the stories more seriously. It seemed like
their son was living two separate lives.
John was in high
school for a couple of more years. During that time he played his sports,
actually found a girlfriend and led a fairly normal life. He even won a
scholarship to a college where he was to study journalism with a minor in
creative writing. His parents didn’t really find this uncommon since he picked
up poetry and some fiction writing in his junior year but the writings were
always about something he experienced in his other life so no one could tell
how much was truth, and how much was made up.
He took the
scholarship and entered college the following September with the girl he met in
his junior year. Her name was Angela Beth Turner and they were completely in
love to such an extent that she took the same major so she could have the same
classes as him.
She often heard
him talking about Pamela and his other life. Initially there was a lot of
jealousy but that subsided the moment that he told her that she was the one
that he loved. She had no idea why she believed him but she did…at least on the
surface…but there may have been a doubt that she never showed.
--------------------
He did still have
the other life. Every night he would travel to Cuyahoga Falls to be with his friends.
His relationship with Pamela was getting closer. They had started making love
on a regular basis and he even got an apartment with her as soon as they left
school. The thing was, he didn’t realize it but the memories and his other life
never followed him over to that life. That other John Baker, who lived in
Allegheny Heights didn’t exist, at least not to him.
He did have a job
working at the Ascot Race Track as a waiter in the Jockey Club but it didn’t pay
much and Pamela spent her evenings out working. She was a bartender at some bar
in downtown Akron and she made good money doing it but she wasn’t happy having
to work six nights a week until 2:30 a.m. The thing was there was a lot of
stress caused by the relationship and John had the normal medical problems
associated with it. He tried relaxing and having fun but those days faded away
shortly after his graduation. Although he wasn’t married to Pamela their living
together turned more and more as if it was a marriage. The thing was…he was only
20 and he knew that he still had a lot of life he wanted to live.
The next morning
Pamela was still asleep when John woke up. He packed his clothes and then wrote
a note simply saying that he needed his space and decided that it was time for
him to leave. “It isn’t your fault,” it said. “It is all me. I just need to get
away for awhile and this seems to be the best way. No tears, no arguing, just a
clean break. I do love you I just have to do this.” It was cold and impersonal
but that was the way he was.
He went into
downtown Akron, took $250 he had in his pockets and bought a bus ticket. He
didn’t care where the bus was going. He just had the urge to roam and, to him,
this was the best way to cure the urge that was possessing him. He looked at
the city name on the front of the bus. It read Cheyenne…the same city name was
on his ticket. That was good. John always had an interest in the west and
Cheyenne was as good a place as any to see what it was really like.
--------------------
“Honey,” John said
while he wiped the sleep from his eyes, “I don’t think you have to worry about
Pamela anymore. The other me just broke up with her and left town.”
Angela was still
half asleep when he broke the news. She sat up in the bed, pulled the blanket
up around her neck and just looked at him with a look of pure confusion.
“He just up and
left her. All he told her was that he needed his space.”
“You don’t feel
that way do you,” Angela asked as her look changed from confusion to concern.
“I would never want to lose you.” Her eyes widened. They were still holding on
to the last vestige of sleep but she was awake and a tear started forming in
the corner. She wanted to hear the answer but, at the same time, she didn’t
want to hear what he might say.
“Angela…my
darling,” John said as he took her by the hands and kissed her. “I may be him
in some freaked out reality but in this reality I love you. I do love you…I
hope you know that… and I am never going to leave you no matter what he does.”
“I know you do
Honey and I know that you’ll never leave me,” Angela said as she laid back down
on the bed and put her head on his chest. “It just scared me a little bit.”
“Honey,” John
started. “I know that scared you and I never want to do that again. I want to
know one thing…”
“What’s that,” she
asked.
“I was
wondering...” He paused for what seemed like hours even though it was just a
few seconds. “What would you say if I asked you to be my wife?”
Her eyes opened
wide and she started crying harder than she ever cried before. “I’d say no Honey...I
would say no.”
“What,” he asked
with a strong sense of hurt and surprise in his voice.
She leaned over
and gently kissed his chest. “Of course I would love to marry you,” she said
with a giggle in his voice. “What on Earth would make you think I would answer
any other way?”
They spent the
rest of the day kissing, cuddling and making love all day. He kept reinforcing
that he loved her and was never going to leave. He didn’t have to but he did
anyway. For that day…they were a couple and they were happy.
--------------------
John got on the
bus for Cheyenne. It was nearly empty as most of the buses were when they left
Akron but there was a few people scattered throughout the seats. There was one
man John noticed right away. He was older than John…maybe 45 or so and he was
dressed for the west. He had on a big brown hat with a leather headband, a
black duster and brown cowboy boots with silver trim and, John couldn’t believe
it, five pointed spurs.
That’s someone
I want to meet, John thought as he made his way to the back of the bus and
sat in the seat directly in front of the man. “Hi, my name is John…John Baker,”
John said sticking out his hand as he turned around.
The man took
John’s hand shook with a very firm grip. “The name’s Salvatore Perez but
everyone calls me Cheyenne Sal…everyone who I let get to know me that is.” He
went on to tell John about the ranch he lived on. He didn’t own it. He was just
one of the hired hands and he wouldn’t want it any other way. “I ain’t the kind
to sit around doing paperwork all day. You put me on a horse and man…you’ll see
me be one fucking happy man. I think it’s even better than being with a
woman…but that’s fun too…it’s just a lot harder to find.”
By now they were
somewhere out on Rt.20, close to the Indiana-Ohio sate line heading for Chicago
and John was tired. He kind of figured that Sal was going to be there in the
morning so there was plenty of time for them to talk when they got to Chicago
and beyond. Sal agreed that a couple hours of shut eye might be a good idea so
they both took a drink from a flask of Jim Beam Sal was carrying and they both
quickly dozed off.
--------------------
“My God honey,”
John said. “He’s living the life every man wants.”
“What life is
that,” Angela asked with a touch of irritation in his voice.
“He just hopped on
a bus and started going across the country,” he said with a smile. “Every guy,
ever since he was old enough to know about the Wild West has dreamed of just
chucking everything and heading out west to live the cowboy life. I remember
watching Gene Autry and thinking how great it would have been to have lived
back in the late 1880’s especially down in the Arizona Territory.”
“Is that really
what you want,” she asked.
“Honey, I am not
five years old anymore. I have a good life here and I would not give it or you
up for anything in the world so…no…I do not want that life but Honey…if you
don’t mind at least let me have the fantasy of being out there with him.” He
knew better but, one, he wasn’t going to tell her that and second he was living
that life every time he closed his eyes.
‘Okay honey,” she
said with a smile. “You can watch the old movies, you can even dress up if you
like and maybe someday you can go out west for a vacation but you just remember
who you love and who you go to bed with every night and we’ll be fine.” He
agreed…rather quickly for him but he knew that he loved her and she loved him
and, at least, he was still going to be able to watch the westerns channel
whenever he wanted. A lot of women he knew would not have given in that far.
“I know that men
are just little boys in big bodies,” she said as she started laughing. “Hey, it
could be worse. You could be into fantasy baseball or something like that.”
--------------------
The bus took a
side trip and stopped in Fargo. It was sometime around 5:30 in the morning and
the sun was just barely starting to appear above the flat horizon. They driver
yelled that there was going to be a four hour stop for some maintenance they
had to do to the engine. “If you don’t want to wait there’s a bus coming by in
twenty minutes. You can catch that if you want but you’re going to be spending
all day tomorrow in Ogallala and I don’t think any of you want that.”
“Where the fuck is
Ogallala,” John asked.
Sal didn’t tell
him where Ogallala was. Maybe he didn’t know. Maybe he just didn’t like the
name but he looked at John, made a strange face and said, “It isn’t a place
we’d ever want to go. The girls there aren’t very friendly and there is
absolutely nothing to do. It’s one of those cities that closes down at 5:00 and
don’t reopen until 5 the next morning.”
“I guess you’re
right,” John said. He had never heard of the place so who was he to
argue…besides that…maybe Sal was right and Fargo, even at this god-forsaken
time, was the better place to be.
“Well, let’s us go
check out what this place has to offer,” Sal said as he lifted off of his seat.
“I saw a diner about a half mile back. Maybe we should go there and grab
something better than the bus station crap we’ve been eating.” It didn’t take
much convincing for John to agree. He was as tired as Sal was of under-cooked
food and the other stuff they served that was more like cinders than it was
food.
Sal was right. There
wasn’t anything around for the half mile he said between the bus station and
the diner. It was still dark enough for the neon to be on and the bright blues,
yellows and reds made it look like it was an island in the middle of a starless
ocean. The open sign flashed with big bright red letters.
There were signs
on the windows advertising the daily specials, but to John it looked like they
probably had the same daily specials for at least the last couple of years. The
one that caught his eye was one that said, “Three eggs, pancakes and bacon or
sausage -- $1.09. Home fries $.25 extra.”
“Sal, I think I
know what I’m going to get,” he said while he looked at the other signs. Sal
looked at the same sign and thought that he’d most likely get the same. After
all it looked filling and didn’t cost too much.
They went in. The
place was bare-assed empty. The only people there were the waitress and the
cook. Now, the cook looked like the traditional diner cook John knew from the
times he’d go to the Steak & Eggs on Market Street in Akron. He had a five
o’clock shadow that hit five o’clock at least two days before. He had a tee
shirt on that had a few stains. John saw egg, coffee and a couple he couldn’t
figure out no matter how much he looked them and no matter what he was doing he
had a sharp…a very sharp…meat cleaver in his left hand.
The waitress, on
the other hand was young, maybe 25 John thought but she looked like she had
already lived a long hard life. She was wearing a plaid dress that could have
been shorter, flat soled black shoes and a really ugly white net hat. She had a
name tag that read Phoenix. It was a strange name and it caught John’s
attention
When she came over
to give them their menus John stopped her and asked if her name was a nick name
because she was from Phoenix. “No,” she said. “I have never been there. My mom
was really into myths and she liked the way it sounded. Hell, she even lived
there a couple months after Grammy and Gramps died in the car crash.”
‘Thank God your
mom didn’t like the name Ogallala,” Sal said with a laugh.
Phoenix laughed
the kind of fake laugh that says “I’ve heard that all before but I’m going to
humor you so I can get a big tip,” and she went and got them each a cup of the
stuff they called coffee.
“She’s kind of
cute,” John said as he watched her walk behind the counter.
“I guess so. At least
she’s got herself a decent rack and a nice firm little ass.”
They looked up and
saw that she was standing right there with two cups of hot black coffee. She
didn’t say a word; just sitting their coffee down on the table. She glanced at
John and took a long, rather vicious looking, stare at Sal. She wasn’t happy
and they both knew it.
‘I don’t look at
those things,” John said with a smile. He knew that he was lying but, in his
mind, it sounded noble. It must have worked because; although she was still
scowling at Sal she had a smile for John. They sat there for two hours just
talking, drinking the free refills on their coffee, eating a couple pieces of
chocolate cream pie and trying to flirt with Phoenix.
By the time they
were done the sun had risen and the golden glow of the dawn had turned into
bright sunlight but the air was still cool with the bite that only North Dakota
has. There were a few clouds drifting by but they were the light kind that
looked like a veil rather than actual clouds.
“What time you
boys leavin’,” Phoenix asked.
“Well, the bus is
leaving in a couple of hours,” John answered. Sal was starting to get pissed
because this girl, this waitress wasn’t paying him the amount of attention he
thought he deserved.
‘I’m getting off
in a few minutes. How about I show you around a little before you go,” she
asked John. “I’ll even show you places the people around here don’t know
about.” John quickly agreed without looking at Sal or considering what he was
going to be doing.
She went off to
change as a new waitress, a red head named Penny, cleared away the five or six
coffee cups and the plates that they had collected. She wasn’t as pretty as
Phoenix was but Sal seemed to have quickly taken an interest in her so he
didn’t notice when Phoenix returned in a sleeveless shirt and some very short
pants. He also didn’t notice when she and John walked out of the diner and went
down the street.
Two hours later
the bus was fixed, John was there and he was sharing a long kiss with Phoenix
but there was no sign of Sal anywhere. “I wonder where he is,” John asked
without really expecting an answer. By now the door was open and people were
starting to file back into the bus. John reached into his pocket to get his
ticket and found that he not only had his but he had Sal’s ticket too. He
pulled them out and looked at them. “What the fuck?”
Suddenly the loud
speaker announced, “Bus 42 to Denver, Cheyenne and points west will leave in
five minutes.”
“What’s that,” Phoenix
asked.
“Sal must have
given me his ticket and now he ain’t here to get on the bus.”
“What re you going
to do,” she asked with a shy smile on her face. It was obvious that she was
thinking but he didn’t see it and he didn’t answer her. They stood there
looking for Sal but he was nowhere to be seen. Then she asked again what he was
going to do but this time she didn’t give him a chance to answer before she
took the ticket and got on the bus. “You know, I didn’t like this town anyway.”
“Okay,” he said as
he boarded the bus after her. There fifteen, maybe twenty, people on the bus
and the back seats were empty so the made their way past the extended legs and
kids already playing in the aisle, sat down in the back and started talking,
and kissing, as the doors closed, the bus pulled out and started heading south.
--------------------
I can’t believe
that guy, John thought. There is no way I am telling Angie about this.
She’d definitely think that is something I’d secretly want and I don’t.
Just as he thought
that Angela walked into the room, throwing some clothes at him and telling him
that he had to get dressed in a hurry because her mom and dad called and they
were taking them out to lunch. Now, this was big since he hadn’t met her
parents yet and, they must have really wanted to meet him since they drove down
from Jamestown, New York to meet him. “Honey, c’mon we have to get going. It’s
almost noon and their waiting down at the Steak Shack and I told them we’d be
there in a few. I didn’t know your ass was still in bed.”
“Sorry Hon, I had
a big night last night,” he said as he started putting on his clothes. It
wasn’t until he lifted the shirt that he noticed the collar. It was a dress
shirt. “Where did this come from,” he asked. “I don’t even own a shirt like
this.”
“They called at
last night and said that they might stop by so I went out and bought that for
you so you’d make a good impression. Now, I don’t mind your clothes, I really
don’t, but they are conservative and…well…you know.”
‘Why didn’t you
tell me last night?”
She got a slightly
angry look as she answered him so he knew there was no way that this was going
to turn out good. “I did, at least I tried, but you were pretty zoned out by
the time I got home. You probably didn’t hear me,” she said. Then she asked the
question he didn’t want her to ask. “What was it that got to you like that?
What is the other you up to now?”
He knew he didn’t
want to tell her the truth so he took the truth, toned it down and she got the
PG-13 version of it. “He went to Fargo…”
“North Dakota?
What the hell is he doing in North Dakota? I thought he was going to Wyoming?”
“Yeah, Fargo,
North Dakota. The bus broke down and he and that guy Sal went and had breakfast
and looked around town for a while. They stayed there for four hours and when
the bus left Sal wasn’t there to get back on so the other John went on by
himself.” John knew that it wasn’t exactly the truth but, with the stress of
her parents coming, the one thing he didn’t want was to have an argument with
her.
“Where is he
headed,” she asked.
“Cheyenne,
Wyoming…didn’t I tell you that,” she said.
Angela thought for
a minute and realized that he did tell her the day before she just didn’t
remember. “Oh yeah, I remember now. You know that IS beautiful country,” she
said.
He thought about
it and agreed. He always loved those old movies where the mountain men rode the
trails, trapped, herded cattle and always got the girl. Well, at least one
part of that is coming true for him, John thought. Maybe someday…maybe
for our honeymoon Angela and I will make it to the Rockies. Not to Cheyenne of
course. It would be too strange running into the other John some evening. I
don’t think I could handle that and could you imagine how Angela would react?
The lunch went
well, at least from John’s point of view. It was a lot longer than he expected
but they seemed to like him and that was what mattered. They spend the rest of
the day together. He and Angela showed them around town and, in the evening,
John took them to a small community theatre and they watched a locally written
musical called Winter Dance Party 1959. They seemed to like it and actually got
up and danced a couple of times. Then he got them a room at the Allegheny Inn
out on Walnut Tree Rd.
When they finally
got home Angela kissed him very passionately and thanked him for being so
charming. This, to John, was a lot better than the stress he and Angela shared
earlier in the day.
They showered,
made love and set the alarm for 7:30 in the morning so Angela could get a chance
to say good bye to her parents. Then they made love again and finally turned
off the light and the TV and went to sleep.
--------------------
They were sound
asleep when the bus pulled into Rapid City, South Dakota but the driver made
sure that everyone knew that it was a thirty minute stop for dinner. He even
made it a point to shake them after everyone else got off the bus. Phoenix was
the first to regain her senses and, as soon as she did, she kissed John, waking
him up.
“Honey,” she said,
“we have to go get something to eat.” John wasn’t hungry. He just wanted to
sleep but she insisted and nearly dragged him off of the bus. Once they got
inside they both ordered the same things for breakfast and, as soon as they got
it from the cook, they went at sat down at a table close to the front window of
the station. As soon as they sat down Phoenix said that she had an idea. The thought of that scared the hell out of
John but he sat there and listened. “I know that we just met,” she started. “I
really do like you more anyone I have ever met and I would love it if we went
to Las Vegas before we go to Cheyenne.”
“What would we do
there,” John asked.
“We could get
married,” she said with a scared, shy yet brave smile.
John thought for a
minute. He’d done stupider stuff than what she was asking and he did really get
turned on by her. He liked the way she talked, the way she cuddled with him and
even the way she said his name. Maybe he didn’t love her yet but he had a
feeling that it wouldn’t be long before he did so he looked at her, checked his
wallet and handed her $100.
“What is this
for,” she asked. “I am not that kind of a girl…I thought that you were a nice
guy and you do that.” It wasn’t hard to see that she was hurt and it was even
easier to know what she thought the money meant. She raised her hand to slap
him but he grabbed it before she had the chance.
Reaching into his
pocket he took his ticket and handed it to her. “You silly girl…you silly
little girl. I gave you that money to take my ticket and yours and go over
there to the ticket counter and exchange them for tickets to Vegas.” She jumped
up, took the ticket from him and gave him a big hug and an even bigger kiss.
“Well, get going,” he added with a smile and a slight laugh.
It took her about
fifteen minutes to get the tickets. While she was doing that he was getting his
luggage off of the bus.
“John, I got the
tickets but the bus for Las Vegas doesn’t leave until 8:30 tomorrow morning,”
she said. John looked at the clock. It was 7:30 and, when he looked out of the
front door of the station, he saw that the sun was a little over the horizon.
It would be night in another hour or two…maybe two and a half but that would be
pushing it.
“We’re going to
have to spend the night,” he said as he emptied his pockets. He had $45 left
from the money he started out with. A room at anywhere near halfway decent was
going to run at least $60. “Do you have any money,” he asked.
She opened the
small bag she was carrying and found $20 hidden in one of the pockets.
“I have an idea,”
John said. “What do you think of camping under the stars?” She wasnt sure what
he was getting but she said that she would do anything as long as they were
together. “I saw a park across the street when we pulled in…how about us
spending the night there. That would give us enough money to eat on tomorrow
and then get married when we get to Nevada.” She agreed.
At 8:15 their bus
left and they were stranded in a town neither of them ever imagined or visited.
They spent the
next couple of hours watching the TV in the main section of the station and
drinking free refills on the coffee the got when they came in. At 11:00 they
were chased out because the last bus, scheduled to go back to Fargo and then on
to Chicago, Detroit and finally Cleveland, went through. There was no one who
got off and no one got on but it stuck around for an hour before it departed.
They crossed the
street and entered the park. It was beautiful, even under the dim yellow lights
of the lamp that lined the walkway. John looked up and the trees were so thick
that you couldn’t see any of the sky. It was just pure darkness. Near the
center of a big grassy area he saw a bush. It was big and made up of clumps of
smaller bushes. He walked over, knelt down and crawled in. It was perfect.
There was just enough room for him and Phoenix, especially if the cuddled
really close, so he took four shirts out of his bag, rolled them and put them
at one end of the room. He called her in and she looked around and said
something that made him feel good about everything that was happening. She
looked at him, hugged him and told him that she wanted to come back to that
same park and that same bush on there honeymoon. She laughed, then he laughed
and they settled down for the night.
--------------------
John walked over
to Angela and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “I have an idea,” he said.
“Okay,” she
answered. It was a surprise but then again there was something every morning
that surprised her.
“I’m going down to
the sporting goods store and pick up a few things,” he said smiling. “You put
some casual clothes in a bag and be ready when I get back.”
“Okay,” she said
again. “Where are we going?”
He started toward
the door but stopped and turned around. “I have this sudden urge to go camping
and I have to pick some things up.”
“What did he do,”
she asked. He knew what she meant and he knew that he better answer her.
“He’s
camping…sleeping out under the stars,” he said. ‘It looks like a lot of fun
and, I’ve never been camping in my life and I want to try it.” Angela knew it
was something like that but she said that it was okay with her but she looked
at him a minute and decided that it might be better if she went with him but
before they went to the store they had to make one stop. Angela’s parents were ready
to leave and she wanted to stop and tell the good bye.
They made it to
the Allegheny Inn just in time. Her dad was putting the last of their luggage
into the trunk of the car and was tipping the doorman when they pulled up.
“Hi Honey,”
Angela’s mother said as she got out of the car. “We were just getting ready to
call you. Your dad says that we’re wasting daylight so he wanted to get going.”
Angela said that she remembered when she took trips when them as a kid and how
her dad loved seeing the sunrise from the driver’s seat of his car. They missed
the sunrise but it was close enough for her dad to be happy. Her mom took her
off to the side and told her that they wanted to talk to John alone so she
went, got John, took him to her mother and went to the hotel coffee shop for a
cup of coffee while her dad joined John and her mother.
“John,” her dad
said. “Angela has told us a lot about you and we think that she has strong
feelings for you. All we ask is that you don’t hurt her. If you promise us that
we will be happy.” John said that he not only promised that but he added that
he had proposed and was looking forward to marrying her. “We know that…we just
wanted to make sure that it was real and not something she was just telling us.”
John confirmed that it was, in fact, true. Angel’s mom and dad welcomed him
into their family, called Angela back and told her that they liked John and
then they got into their car and drove off.
‘What did they
say,” Angela asked.
“Well, I don’t
know what you told them about me but they told me that you love me and they
welcomed me to the family,” he said. “So, I guess there’s nothing left to do
but actually do go ahead and do it.”
“What?”
“Screw the camping
for now,” he said with a smile “Let’s go up to Niagara Falls and get married.”
She didn’t know what to say. She definitely wanted to get married but it was
still a shock. “Well, we can be in Canada in four hours, get the license and
get married on Monday. What do you think?” She didn’t need to think anymore.
She just jumped into his arms, kissed him and asked him if they had all the
papers needed to get across the border. He said yes so she smiled and simply
said…”Let’s go.”
They went and got
a couple breakfast sandwiches and coffee, got in the car, drove up to Saegertown,
got on Rt. 79 and headed north. Once they made it up to Erie John turned right
onto Rt. 90 and 90 minutes later they were at the Canadian border explaining
that they were going to get married.
“Most people get
married and THEN come to the falls,” the border guard said.
“I know,” John
said.
“Darling, we
aren’t the kind to do things the way everyone else does,” Angela said as ash
looked at the guard, smiled and looked over at John “Are we honey?” He didn’t
answer, at least not out loud. He just shook his head and smiled at the guard.
The guard took it as exactly what it was…a weak joke. Then he smiled at them,
wished them luck and waved them through.
It was another
thirty minutes until they got to the falls but it was a nice ride so it didn’t
matter. They didn’t bother checking into a hotel. They rushed right over to the
courthouse, filled out some papers, paid the fee and got the license. There was
a three day waiting period so the wedding itself had to wait until Monday but
that was okay. They had planned for the weekend anyway so they went down by the
gorge and got a hotel. It was nice and the food was really good so they were
set.
--------------------
The bus took a
little over a day to make it down to Vegas. They took the time to talk between
kisses and they really got to know each other. It seemed to both of them that
they had a lot in common and, at least to John, it seemed like she may be the
perfect woman for him.
It was nearly 1:00
a.m. when they finally pulled into the bus station. The first thing they did
was head for a wedding chapel they saw a couple of blocks away. The “preacher”
was dressed as Elvis. The service was beautiful and lasted about 25 minutes
since he sang a couple songs before he got started but, by the time they left,
they were Mr. and Mrs. John Baker.
“How much money do
we have left,” John asked.
Phoenix checked
her purse while john emptied his wallet and pockets. Together they had a little
over $300. They looked around and found the nearest casino. John too $50 and
went in. It didn’t take long. John wasn’t very good at cards so he lost $45 of
their money within ten minutes. Then he took the remaining $5 and went over to
the slot machines to try there. He hit for five or ten dollars a couple of
times but not enough to any more than break even on the original $50. After
another hour of trying, winning and losing he gave up and went back to Phoenix
who had been waiting across the street in a coffee shop. He walked across and
gave her a kiss.
“How much did you
lose,” she asked.
“Nothing,” he said
with a smile.
“Well then…how
much did you win?”
He smiled again
and told her that he didn’t win anything either. Then he took the $50 from his
pocket and handed it back to her. He could tell that she was very mixed on what
she was feeling. She was upset that he didn’t win but it was a good thing that
he didn’t lose anything.
‘I have an idea,”
he said. “Let’s go down to the strip and get a room for the night. We can call
it our honeymoon.’ She smiled at the thought. “After all…this is our wedding
night.” It was completely out of character for him but he realized that they
had been together for a little while now and they hadn’t yet made love. They
had kissed, cuddled and touched but for some reason he hadn’t pushed her to
make love to him and, to him, it felt good for their wedding night to be the
first time for them.
They went down to
one of the larger casino/hotels and checked in. The room was a little over $100
but it was worth it. He was the only one with luggage so she spent the evening
wearing some of his clothes. It wasn’t very sexy on her but in his eyes she was
never more beautiful. They did make love all night and during that night she
whispered to him that she had been a virgin. He said that he was honored to
have been her first and then they both fell asleep in each other’s arms.
The next morning
they both went down to the lobby. She kissed him and took $100, told him to
wait for her and then she went into the casino. Two minutes later she came back
and handed him the $100 and an additional $100 on top of it. “I went and played
23 on the roulette table. I won on the first spin”
“Why 23,” he
asked.
“That’s the day we
got married,” she said with a big smile.
John thought for a
minute and reminded her that the day they got married was the 25th.
‘No Honey,” she
said. “That is the day we had the ceremony. I was married to you the minute you
asked me and that was the 23rd.’ John thought how romantic that was
and he agreed that their anniversary would always be on the 23rd no
matter what that piece of paper said.
Later that day
they went t catch the bus back to Fargo.. They watched bus after bus fill and
leave. Some were headed south to L.A. while others headed back east. That was
something that John did even consider. His life in Cuyahoga Falls was like
ancient history to him now. From what he had seen of the west he liked it and
he felt that it was where he wanted to spend the rest of his life.
Yeah, John had
wanted to go to Cheyenne but Fargo wasn’t that bad. Besides that, how
different could Cheyenne be from Fargo, he thought. If it wasn’t for
that bus stopping in Fargo I would have never met Phoenix and I would be alone
again. I should be grateful for that. Then his mind wandered to Sal. John
wondered what had happened to him. Did he ever make it out of Fargo? Where
did he disappear to that morning? I guess I’ll never know.
Their bus arrived
at 11:00 p.m. and departed at 11:30. They settled into the same seat they had
when they arrived. Phoenix never stopped smiling all the way back to Fargo.
They discussed plans for their future, including that they both wanted two
kids, a boy and a girl. She had called ahead and talked to her parents and her
boss. Her parents were ecstatic and her boss, although upset, he said that her
job was still there waiting for her after she took a couple weeks off to settle
into married life.
--------------------
John and Angela
got married the following Monday. The wedding took place in the county clerk’s
office in front of two witnesses…his secretary and one of the other workers but
despite that they were married and they both loved the idea.
The dreams
continued but they were nothing like they were before. John saw that his
counterpart was also living a happily married life. In the next few years john
and Angela had three kids…twin girls and a baby boy. The other John also had
children in his marriage…two little girls. They both had good jobs.
Pennsylvania John worked in a public relations firm as a copy writer. Fargo’s
John worked as a construction worker renovating old buildings.
Then, just as
suddenly as they started the dreams stopped. John tried every night but he
couldn’t get anything to come out. He even went to the extent of hypnosis to
try to get them to start again but nothing worked. They were gone. John tried
finding his counterpart by calling directory assistance but his number was
unlisted and, despite the fact that he was John Baker, they would not give him
the number.
Years went by and
the lack of John’s other life was digging deeper and deeper into his soul. It
was affecting his relationship with Angela who said that she missed hearing
about what the other john was up to. It affected his work and the changes that
took place in John’s personality scared those around him especially his
relationship with his children. It got to such an extent that Angela took the
kids and fled to her mother’s house and decided to stay there until he got his
act straightened out.
A month after
Angela left John was sitting on his couch, drinking a beer and suffering from
the depressed state he was usually in. he had been reading books, watching
shows and seeing everything else he could about alternate lived and suddenly he
knew what to do…he had to drive North Dakota and find the other John Baker but
he knew he could not do it alone. He called Angela who agreed to leave the kids
with her parents for a week or so and travel with John to Fargo to see what had
happened.
They left the next
morning, following Angela’s father’s advice they left at sunrise. That was
actually a big benefit since the sun was behind them they didn’t have the glare
of the sun to worry about and they could take their time getting there. By
nightfall they were at the Chicago city limits. They found a decent hotel, got
separate rooms and stopped to rest for the long trip ahead.
In the morning
they followed the same routine and, as the sun rose over Lake Michigan, they
started off on the final leg of the trip.
Angela was more
talkative than she was on the first leg. Maybe she was more relaxed knowing
that he was going to respect her nervousness and maybe it was because she had a
feeling that all of this mess would soon be over. Either way…the trip was a lot
more pleasant.
They didn’t stop
for the night. The two of them drove straight through to Fargo. Once they made
it they stopped at a Comfort Inn out on Rt. 94 and checked in. This time it was
not separate rooms. They got a room with a single queen-sized bed and, for the
first time in months, he got the chance to be in love and make love to his wife
again.
The next morning
John and Angela went into town and looked up the address for the other John
Baker. It was hard but they finally found his house and went over. Angela
stayed in the car when John went to the door. He rang the bell and a little
girl answered and screamed, “DADDY!” John just stood there and looked at her.
“Daddy isn’t
here,” Phoenix said as she walked toward the door. The minute she saw him
standing there her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open. “John,” she said
and she started crying. “Is it really you? Where have you been?”
‘No,” he said as
coldly as he possibly could. “I am looking for a man who lives here by the name
of John Baker. I have heard a lot about him and I felt like I just had to meet
him.”
“But…y…you look
just like him,” she said as she started to cry. “He left for work one day about
three years ago and no one has heard from him since. We filled out a missing
person report but nothing ever came of it.” John told her that was how he heard
about her John. We was walking down the street in Allegheny Heights and a
Pennsylvania state trooper pulled up, threw him in the patrol car and spent the
rest of the day questioning him about his disappearance.
“It took my wife
coming down and telling the cops who I was before they’d let me go,” he said as
he waved over to Angela who came over and introduced herself without revealing
her last name. “Phoenix, this is my wife Angela,” he said before he caught the
slip that he knew Phoenix was sure to catch as soon as he said it. Angela heard
what he said and nearly fell back off of the step. John and Angela were
right…she did catch it as soon as John said it.
“Phoenix…you
called me Phoenix,” she said. Her crying stopped and it was replaced with a
very strong, bitter anger. “How the hell do you know my name? Who in the fuck
are you?”
John thought for a
minute and looked at Angela as if he was looking for her to have some kind of
magic that would make Phoenix forget what she had heard. She didn’t have that
magic but she did have a logical answer. If there wasn’t a lie that could
reverse the damage…then simply tell the truth. “Go ahead John…tell her,” she said.
“You sure as hell couldn’t make it any worse.”
“Tell me what,”
Phoenix said. Her anger subsided and was replaced by a curiosity mixed with a
big dose of irritation. There was one thing that was plain to both Angela and
John…this was not a woman who would put up with any bullshit so John would have
to be very specific and very, very honest.
“First off…my name
is John Baker and I live in Allegheny Heights, Pennsylvania and this all
started when I was a boy,” he said. “I started having dreams about another boy
named John Baker who lived in a city named Cuyahoga Falls somewhere in Ohio. It
took me a while but I finally realized that it wasn’t dreams. I was living the
other John’s life whenever I slept.”
“Bullshit,” she
said with a voice the showed that her anger had returned in spades. “That is
fucking bullshit.”
“Wait a minute,”
John yelled as she picked up a vase and was ready to throw it…most likely at
his head. “John met you at a diner at the edge of town. His bus broke down and
he came into your place. There was no one there except you, the cook and John.
There was another. His name was Sal…Cheyenne Sal. He disappeared and you used
his ticket to go to Cheyenne. Instead of going to Cheyenne you changed and went
to Vegas and got married. A preacher who looked like Elvis married you and you
have a 45 of him singing Hawaiian Wedding Song. You keep it in the top right
had dresser drawer under your family album and John’s favorite shirts.”
“How do you know
that?”
Angela looked at
her and the glanced at John and told Phoenix that it was because her John had
lived a lot of life that the other John had lived. “I have heard so much about
the two of you that I finally left him when the visions stopped because it
really had a big effect on him and he took it all out on me and the kids,”
Angela said.
“Then this is all
real,” Phoenix asked. John and Angela both answered at the same time that it
definitely was real just as one of the children and asked if they could play
with daddy. Phoenix knelt down and explained as best she could to a five year
old that the man she was talking to wasn’t daddy just a man who looked like
daddy. The child was a little too young to understand but he went back into his
room and started playing again. “Why are you here,” Phoenix asked as she sat
down on the couch and stared straight out of he window.
“I have got to
find out what happened to him to get my mind straight again. I have got to know
why the dreams stopped.”
Phoenix looked at
him, laughed and told him that the police and everyone else gave up looking for
him a long time ago. “They figured that he met some other girl and took off in
the middle of the night,” she said. “They told me that 98% of all men who
disappear just don’t want to be married anymore so they just find someone and
they split.”
John looked at her
and reassured her that was definitely not what happened. “If he had just left…I
would have known,” he said. “I have known everything he has done for most of
our lives. Trust me…wherever he is…he is not with another woman.” John asked
her where john was headed the last time she saw him and she said that he was
working on a motel outside of town…somewhere out on 94 near.231.
Angela looked at
John and whispered something to him that she definitely didn’t want Phoenix to
hear. The hotel they were staying at was out on Rt. 94 and she thought that she
remembered seeing a sign down the block that said, “State Rt. 231 -- .5 miles”
“John,” she said. “We couldn’t…could we?” Neither of them said another word
except to apologize for bothering her and thanking her for her help. Of course,
this left Phoenix more confused than she was before but she just shut the door
as they left and went in to play with her children. As Angela stepped out of
the door she asked again, “John, we couldn’t be staying in THAT hotel…could
we?” He didn’t answer.
“Let’s go back to
the hotel and do some thinking,” John said as he took Angela by the hand and
walked her to the car. She agreed as she held his hand tighter. “I hope we can
find him soon. I can’t wait for all of us to go home and get OUR lives together
again.”
“I do too,” she
said as she smiled a very uneasy smile at him which he returned.
It didn’t take
them long to get back to the hotel. Angela kept asking him what the last vision
was that he shared with the other John. He tried as hard as he could, over and
over again he tried, but he couldn’t remember anything. “John,” she said. “If
you can’t, or don’t want to, remember this I not going to end and we are going
to be right back where we started before we started this trip and this time I
am NOT going to be coming back.” John agreed. He already knew it but he didn’t
want to say anything. But he was glad that she did.
That night, back,
at the hotel, he went to the desk and insisted on a separate room for the
night. Angela looked at him and asked why. “I think I need to spend the night
alone and not have you as a distraction,” he said. “Now, Honey, I have to do
this.” She didn’t agree with it but she said that it okay as the desk clerk
handed him the key to a room at the other end of the hotel. As he turned he
looked at her and said, “Honey, I am going to say good night here and get down
to the room. I promise you that I will be here in the morning.” She said that
she knew and that she would be there waiting when the sun came up. Then she
kissed him and, for the second time since they met, Angela and John went to
sleep in separate beds. He went to his room and took a shot from the minibar
and fell asleep in less than ten minutes.
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